happy birthday, longtimenosee.

yeah, it's been some time.
we never meet each other again after THAT day, nor do we even contact each other.
everything has changed since then.
we're not like what we used to be anymore.
cause it's already the past, something that we wont be able to turn around anymore.
yes, you may see that I may let it go easily because I'm a guy.
and eventually everything will end up becomes the guy's fault.
sad right?
you're not me, of course you wouldn't know.


you wouldn't know, 
when you loved someone so much, how much courage do you have to put into your heart, just to say those few words of cruelty to them.
you wouldn't know,
how much pressure that you have to bare in your heart, when you face not only a group of people who keeps on doing psycho attacks on you.
you wouldn't know,
how is it to cry without tears in your eyes while all you can do is just to see how your love one suffer when all the tears are like rivers deep inside you.
you wouldn't know,
how broken your heart was, when you say something that broke theirs.
you wouldn't know,
sometimes you hold so tight it slips right through your hands.


we gave it all, to watch it fall, like we've never meant at all.
I give and give the best of me, but couldn't give you what you need.
I chose to be the so-called bad guy.
to say those cruel words to you.
not because of my own selfishness.
for sure because I love you.


it's all over now.
though I know that both of you may hate me for life.
I just hope that I can be, the only person you'll realize that came to your picture that's daring to be honest to both of you in your lives.


I hope you and your daughter are doing fine.
thanks to both of you,
who came up in my life,
and build up colors in it,
for all the things that both of you had done for me,
my never-ending appreciations to both of you.
wish you two all the best in life.
I know both of you can do it without me.
I'll do my best too, to live a good life, without both of you.


happy birthday to you, auntie.