I wish... to be like a kid again. Can I?

for some people, movies like Rising of the Guardian would be some sort of a joke.

what's all these Santa Claus, Tooth Fairy, Easter Bunny, Sandman, or even Jack Frost jokers are trying to do? they're just KIDDIES' stories. they ain't real.

answer to that? lies on which you stand on.

your own to settle.

instead of talking about the characters themselves, why don't we talk about something else more important like the VALUE of it?

the thing is, this movies itself teaches me of the importance of 

IMAGINATIONS,

DREAMS,

VISIONS,

MIRACLES,

HOPE.

When people or even LIFE itself tells you that all these are bullshit, trust me, those people who said it are the ones that has issues, not you.

People's perception about all these is that, "you go to school, you graduate, and then you go for work to earn a living, and then you might be having your own family, and then you retire from your work, and then that's the time you'll have grand kids, then you get old enough and then, you fill in the last blank." which is NOT WRONG.

although it's NOT WRONG, but it's definitely NOT RIGHT either.

what I'm trying to say is, life doesn't have to be FIXED in these ways.

everyone has imaginations, everyone has dreams to achieve, everyone has visions that they see, everyone has witnessed miracles before in their lives or through the lives of others, and most importantly, everyone has hope, towards someone or something.

just because that reality is cruel, I've been stupid enough to let life or even the society to shape my thinking towards these things.

true enough, there are times, where reality is our teacher.

so don't let life, people, or even the rules tells you that you can't do it, you won't be able to make it, or you're not gonna be there, things like that.

lastly, all of these are NOTHING WITHOUT LOVE.

let all of these, be done in Love.

Lord, please restore it for me. every single broken pieces of it. I want You and I need You.

Starting from Page 0.

This is totally a meaningful song.

It goes straight to the heart when I first listened to it.

Believe it or not, it made me think deep inside for what I've been through for this 1 year. Dang!

Okay, gotta put down that "PRIDE" of yours in your heart.

Honestly, now is the time I'd be true to myself.

YES,

I was scared, I was unprepared.

The thing is,

sometimes,

there's no time for us to even sit down and think straight

when we're going through miles and miles of serious decisions to do.

In the process, being strong is not even an option for us to choose

when being strong is just the only option we have.

I wanna make a change.

But I guess I'm not that strong to do so.

Expect everyone to understand your feelings?

Nah, everyone had enough of their own problems to deal with.

But sometimes, understanding people do helps us a lot

even if it's only by listening to what others might pour out.

So, to you, you, you, and you out there, 

bear in mind, you're deeply appreciated. :)

Empty

first time ever,

I'm feeling so weak,

feeling so useless.

Demotivated.

Somehow, the things I love to do the most, becomes the things that I do not have the energy doing on.

what's going on?

WHAT WENT WRONG?

something must have went wrong somewhere.

too many things happened in this few months.

everything was so quick in pace.

sometimes can't even give myself some time to catch a breath, or to think.

just graduated from my diploma not long ago.

and also, went to Taiwan to participate in the well-known The Million Star singing competition.

and yeah, I've lost.

personal feelings after the competition?

well, made me think of why I get to joined that competition in the first place.

my own opinion? everything's too fast for me.

I might not be ready for it yet.

I mean, "ME" instead of my singing "me".

but, I don't wanna regret on didn't try going through these kind of stuff.

cause chances doesn't come twice.

when there is one, grab it!

and competitions like these makes me know that, nothing comes easy.

outwardly, it seems to be only a singing competition.

but while competing in it, it's NOT JUST a singing competition.

it's living under a cruel reality.

the socialization between contestants, the organizer, the public, your friends and family, or anyone else.

sometimes you just can't do the things you want or sing the ones you love to.

which makes a lotta things are restricted indirectly/directly.

first I thought that,

things can go real smooth as planned or as expected.

but somehow, things turned another way round.

felt unexpected, for real.

you ask me if I feel down/sad? yes.

but WHAT CAN I DO?

not that everyone can help me do something about it.

you know what?

I should let myself disappear once in a while.

so that I would not be someone else's problem.

just to let you know,

I may be a 慢半拍 type of person, but I'm trying to do better!